Posted by Steve Leyland on 10/01/05 08:27

Hello Terrence Cooter, Is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can
hear me. Is there anyone at home?

: Vote for these people tomorrow.
:
: Matthew Moulton: KOOK of the MONTH Every month special recognition is
: given to someone whose Usenet Kookery is judged to have surpassed all
: others. This is the Kook of the Month Award (KotM), voted (somewhat
: informally) by the denizens of AUK.
:
: WFB/TJ: CLUELESS NEWBIE of the MONTH Similar to KotM, but reserved
: only for the most highly clueless and incorrigible newbies of Usenet.
: The Clueless Newbie of the Month (CNotM) is pretty much the same sort
: of thing as the KotM, but honors spectacular cluelessness on Usenet
: rather than Kookery. Actually being a newbie is not a strict
: requirement for eligibility; but the type of cluelessness being
: recognized needs to be of the sort typical of newbies. If someone has
: been on the net for some time and still acts like a newbie, they're
: eligible.
:
: Dave Hillstrom: COWARD of the MONTH Goes to the biggest yellow
: bastard of the month on Usenet. The CotM has aslo been known as the
: "Brad Jesness" award.
:
: Sycho: GOLDEN KILLFILE Given to the most killfile worthy net.kooks on
: the face of Usenet. This award recognizes exceptional killfilable
: merit; if you are unworthy enough to be ignored by everyone on the
: face of the earth, you are eligible for this award.
:
: Matthew Moulton: VICTOR VON FRANKENSTEIN "WEIRD SCIENCE" AWARD Given
: to those inspired, pioneering visionaries and their worthy
: inventions, institutions and prides-of-joys, who have reasoned it
: out, who KNOW The Answer, that would know how to use it to make for a
: better humanity....if only somebody would listen to them.
:
: Matthew Moulton: KOOK of the YEAR A just reward for the best KotM of
: the year.
:
: -- Internet Awards --
:
: Kadaitcha Man: LOONEY MAROON AWARD For the greatest net.loon of the
: month, including but not limited to KotM candidates. Formerly given by
: reverse-acclaim, executive designation and outright acclamation, now
: reserved solely for the wild whims of the AUK populace. This award is
: generally given to the least comprehensible candidates.
:
: Spanky the Thunder Chicken: PALMJOB PADDLE Named for the most-spanked
: person in the history of the Internet, Wilhelm Palmer (Bill Palmer,
: aka "Palmjob"). The self-styled Flame Giant, who has never won a
: single flamewar in his existence. This award is given to the person
: who gets spanked (as in, thrashed) the most in a given month, be it
: by their opponents or even their own hand.
:
: Terrence Cooter: HAMMER of THOR Awarded on an as-needed basis for
: exceptional feats of LART strength.
:
: -- Lifetime Achievement --
:
: Kadaitcha Man: BOBO AWARD Given to they who rise above and beyond the
: call of net.looniness, the Bobo is reserved for those whose sheer
: quest at whatever it is they're pursuing knows Absolutely No Bounds,
: crossing the lines of legal dispute, losing everything in particular,
: even death. Several Bobo honorees are, in fact, deceased. Think of it
: as the Internet's version of the Darwin Award.
:
: PJR: BUSTED URINAL AWARD The reward for the Lamest of the Lame on the
: Internet. One who clogs and stinks up the joint like a busted urinal,
: you could say.
:
: Matthew Moulton: UNABOMBER SURPRISE A fitting presentation to those
: most gifted with the Long Wind, they who have the unique talent of
: saying in a million words that which could have been said in one.
:
: ThePsyko: BOLO BULLIS "FOAM DUCK" PRIZE The spoonerism for "dumb
: fuck", for those who've lost more marbles than a Chinese Checker
: factory will ever make. Given in form of reversed reverse-acclamation.
:
: BUZZARD: TAR & FEATHERS Reserved solely for the Terminally Clueless
: on the net, those most highly incorrigible past all hope crusaders
: who in another time and reality would've been tarred and feathered
: and ridden out of town on a rail. Preferably one with a bridge out.
: Over a canyon.
:
: -- Samaritan Awards --
:
: Terrence Cooter: GENE SPAFFORD "USENET SAMARITAN" AWARD Not counted
: as a Kook award, but given to whoever shows the greatest helpfulness
: towards Usenet in any given lifetime.
:
: Terrence Cooter: JIM NITCHALS "INTERNET SAMARITAN" AWARD The netwide
: version of the Spaffie, named in memory of the man who showed the
: civilized side of\ spamfighting.
:
: -- Memorial Awards --
:
: Kadaitcha Man: EARL GORDON CURLEY MEMORIAL AWARD Commonly referred to
: as the Curley Award, it is used to commemorate those most emulative
: of Earl Curley, a substance-abusing incoherent crook with delusions
: of godhead with a penchant for censoring all possible opposing
: viewpoints notwithstanding the highly strange ones he himself held.
: This once proud KotM alumnus mastered in the art of sock puppetry,
: participated in mildly amusing but mostly painful websites and had an
: unerring ability towards self-destructive behavior to get back at his
: opponents. It is called Curley's MEMORIAL Award because he is quite
: literally very Dead, the end result of his exhilarting rise in
: net.kookery. Or, as the newsmedia put it simply, "died suddenly". As
: the only one who's gone this far above and beyond the call of
: net.kookery, he deserves an award in his honor, for aspiring
: net.loons everywhere.
:
: Sean Monaghan: GEORGE ARMSTRONG CUSTER "KICKED @$$" AWARD Given to
: those brave, inspiring crusaders who will keep up a lost lunatic
: cause despite all odds, even after the enemy has won, set up their
: own superpower in their midst and are chugging Guinness in a
: Kook-free world scenario.
:
: Matthew Moulton: KENNY McCORMICK MEMORIAL MEDAL Named after the famed
: South Park boy wonder, this medal is given to they who lose 5 or more
: Internet accounts as a result of their net.kookery, but keep coming
: back for more, to be killed off again and again and again.
:
: Woodchuck Bill: GEORGE PICKETT MEMORIAL TROPHY For that which does the
: greatest impression of Pickett's Charge in any given month.
:
: Matthew Moulton: DOUGLAS E. MACKALL MEMORIAL MACE Named for the dearly
: departed denizen of AUK whose vision of net.loon-free Usenet posting
: freedom helped make AUK the place it is today. Given to that which
: has proven itself most worthy of being ignored by every ISP abuse
: department on the face of the net.
:
: The anal pineapple was not on the list, but that nomination goes to
: Pinku Sensei.

this lits o' haet sux0rs, as I am not included.
<sulks>
<must try harder>

--
Steve Leyland
mhm32x16 Smeeter#24 WSD#41
flower: three 6 four 9 five 8 eight 9
em ess en: my 1st name at purgatory dot org
Alcatroll Labs Inc (bongwater maintenance dept)
http://www.insurgent.org/~alcatroll/

=^MEOW MEOW ARMY^=

Atheism: A non-prophet organization.
======================================================================
"My suggestion is to completely ignore idiots like Leland. They are the
lowest form of pond scum. People like him have tried unsuccessfully in
the past to disrupt the newsgroup. The best medicine is to completely
ignore them. As I'm sure you'll see, they're most intelligent response
is to yell nasty names. Other than that, they have nothing."

JG, netKKKop, alt.sailing.asa
======================================================================
"Warning to all:
Steve Leyland is a trolling twat of the highest order. Killfile the
muppet now and move on. Even the briefest of searches on his past
UseNet posts will reveal the truth. You have been warned. *plonk*"

Bear, netKKKop, uk.rec.motorcycles
======================================================================
"I didn't delete any part of your meaningless, pointless, worthless
post in order to clearly demonstrate that you are the nemesis of
Usenet: the crossposting, non-editing, diagram-creating worthless,
dickless, brainless, gutless, mindless, ball-less, spineless, flaccid,
obese, fish-belly pale, ugly, VD-ridden, moronic, bald, hunch-backed,
flat-footed, odoriferous, obnoxious, fecal-smelling, buck-toothed,
physically handicapped, fungus-infected, HIV positive, mud-packing,
masturbating, whining, simpering, self-important, arrogant, egomaniacal
POS that takes up more bandwidth than a despicable binary-poster, and
for no apparent reason beyond seeing his own defecatory vomitus
slithering down the screen in vile green rivulets."

Admiral Halsey, alt.sailing.asa
======================================================================
"I went to the Garden of Love,
And saw what I never had seen;
A Chapel was built in the midst,
Where I used to play on the green.

And the gates of this Chapel were shut
And "Thou shalt not," writ over the door;
So I turned to the Garden of Love
That so many sweet flowers bore.

And I saw it was filled with graves,
And tombstones where flowers should be;
And priests in black gowns were walking their rounds,
And binding with briars my joys and desires."

William Blake.
======================================================================
"When the Earth has been ravaged and the animals are dying, a tribe of
people from all races, creeds and colours shall put their faith in
deeds, not words, and make the land green again. They shall be known as
Warriors of the Rainbow, protectors of the environment."

Native American prophecy


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Meow

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