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Posted by Onideus Mad Hatter on 09/19/07 19:25
On Wed, 19 Sep 2007 12:14:55 -0700, reidman24 <reidman@gmail.com>
wrote:
>Sorry man, I've been running a forum for 9 years now -- I have a black
>belt in troll-fu.
Sorry kiddo, but I just emailed the following to your client:
: I just wanted to let you know how horrible I think your site design
: looks. First of all the palette used doesn't fall within the scope of
: professional color theory:
: http://www.backwater-productions.net/_images/_Muses/Color_Theory.png
:
: Here's a lovely quote for you:
:
: "When choosing colors for your design, remember a few rules for mixing
: colors. The human eye cannot focus on red and blue at the same time.
: Trying to read red type on a blue background or vice versa causes
: extreme eye fatigue. Your audience will not be receptive to your
: message if it hurts them to read it. Never, ever use blue type on a
: red background and even worse, is red type on a blue background."
:
: Another problem with your site is the over use of fonts. Generally
: speaking you want to stick with just two font styles, any more than
: that will create a jumbled, messy looking design that will make it
: hard for your viewers to focus on any one thing.
:
: Yet another problem with the site is that when the user scrolls down
: the page the navigation bar is lost. This is a VERY amateur level
: design structure. Professional level design teaches that you should
: NEVER lose the users ability to navigate through your site, because
: once you do the only navigation they have left is that great big back
: arrow at the top of their browser that's likely going to take them
: right off yer site...and they won't be back.
:
: The graphics on your site are also poorly done. Not only have they
: been improperly split apart and compressed, the tilting effect was
: done very poorly and has produced some very jagged, nasty looking
: edges that really stand out and practically scream "our site was
: designed by a 15 year old!"
:
: Overall the design the very plain, cliche, cookie cutter looking and
: doesn't really convey anything about your business. It's boring and
: annoying to browse at best. I'm not sure if you just got suckered
: into buying some $15 web template (or even worse got resold a $15 web
: template for 10 times the original price), but in either case your
: website at this point is only serving to hurt your business and you
: would be far better off without it. If you're not even going to take
: the bother to at least attempt to take the endeavor seriously and have
: an ACTUAL professional level site made...don't waste people's
: bandwidth.
:
: --
: Matthew Moulton
: http://www.backwater-productions.net
--
Onideus Mad Hatter
mhm ¹ x ¹
http://www.backwater-productions.net
http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog
Hatter Quotes
-------------
"You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the
best."
"I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you
with it."
"I'm not a professional, I'm an artist."
"Your Usenet blinders are my best friend."
"Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!"
"Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my
bad."
"There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..."
"The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols."
"Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity
of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?"
"Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct
that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others
of its relevancy."
"Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start
creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper."
"Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are."
"People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that
they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just
givin em out for free."
"Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere.
So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest,
to their merry little mess."
"There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly
horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip
their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand
sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible
images burned into their tiny little minds'."
"How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even
properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts."
"Those who record history are those who control history."
"I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage,
endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you
don't get sent to me...I come for you."
"Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton
tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head."
"Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a
function?"
"Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid.
Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast
indicates an increase in Webtv users."
"Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww,
gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
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