Posted by Onideus Mad Hatter on 10/09/07 12:15

On Tue, 09 Oct 2007 04:59:40 -0000, "webmastercorner.blogspot.com"
<ebied4ever@gmail.com> wrote:

>I'm Mohammed Ebied an Egyptian junior webmaster

A "junior webmaster"...what...the...fuck...is...that? o_O

>with good experience in online marketing.

....such as?

>I'm looking for a job in any of the following
>positions junior web designer, junior web developer

Maybe you should just change your name to "Junior", eh kid? Why don't
you stay in school and maybe you can graduate out of the "junior"
training panties you keep wetting yourself in. Just a thought.

>or online marketer.

*snicker*

I take it English isn't your primary language, eh Junior?

>I've good experience in HTML/XHTML, CSS, JavaScript,
>Photoshop, SQL, & MySQL and basic knowledge of PHP, ASP.net, XML,
>Flash, Joomla, OsCommerce & WordPress.

....such as?

I mean, don't you have any examples of websites you've done? Even if
you're a college flunkie you should at the very least have a
portfolio. I mean do you honestly believe that ANYBODY would hire you
based on nothing more than what you idly claim in some newsgroup? I
mean you might just as well be claiming that you're an astronaut and
you've flow to the moon six or seven times.

>I also have experience in learning and excelling at new technologies
>as needed.

....and pulling complete bullshit out of yer ass too, apparently.

>My email is ebied4ever@gmail.com. I can be reached anytime via my cell
>phone, +20109598811 or via my msn ebied4ever@hotmail.com.

Mmmm, nothin spells "professional" like a hotmail account! And
posting through Google froups no less (the WebTV interface of Usenet).
Oh yeah, you're sure a real winner, Junior! And posting to
alt.design.graphics where there are just DOZENS (read none) of people
looking for web developers, woah, you sure know a LOT about
"marketering" yourself, huh Junior? *nods*

--

Onideus Mad Hatter
mhm ¹ x ¹
http://www.backwater-productions.net
http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog


Hatter Quotes
-------------
"You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the
best."

"I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you
with it."

"I'm not a professional, I'm an artist."

"Your Usenet blinders are my best friend."

"Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!"

"Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my
bad."

"There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..."

"The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols."

"Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity
of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?"

"Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct
that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others
of its relevancy."

"Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start
creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper."

"Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are."

"People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that
they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just
givin em out for free."

"Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere.
So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest,
to their merry little mess."

"There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly
horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip
their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand
sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible
images burned into their tiny little minds'."

"How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even
properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts."

"Those who record history are those who control history."

"I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage,
endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you
don't get sent to me...I come for you."

"Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton
tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head."

"Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a
function?"

"Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid.
Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast
indicates an increase in Webtv users."

"Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww,
gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )

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